LIGHTNING RELEASES (1/24/2014) – In a dramatic development which draws into question the whole nature of the universe, twin scientists in Carmel, California have identified the mysterious “rock” on Mars, and the results are astonishing. As NASA’s rover ‘Opportunity’ continues to photograph the red planet, offering glimpses of the rocky terrain never seen before, Carmel Scientists Piers and Mac McDowell have studied recent footage, with a focus on what NASA technicians have called the “mysterious doughnut-shaped” object imbedded in the rocky soil. The McDowell’s conclusion is that it is not a doughnut, but a discarded bag of Pine Brothers Softish Throat Drops, one of America’s top selling throat drops which were first introduced in 1870.
“We’re not sure how it got there, but it’s there, clearly,” said Dr. Mac McDowell, who has been studying the red planet for most of his life. “I agree,” said fellow scientist Piers McDowell. “If you zoom in on the image, the details are unmistakable. We are over the moon at this development, though neither of us can agree on how it might have landed there. It looks like the cherry flavor.” One theory is that the bag was stuck to the chassis of the rover, when it landed on Mars. The Opportunity rover first landed on Mars on January 25th, 2004, and is approaching it’s 10 anniversary.
NASA offered no comment on this recent development, but speculation persists within the world’s scientific community, as to what other consumer products might be viewed on the red surface as technology improves, allowing for closer inspection.
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